Musings of a Carmelite Fool

As the journey begins for the Fool, the Magician or more aptly called the Wizard is the first character he meets. The Wizard is a change-maker, a prolific teacher and a master of his own field. The Wizard shows the Fool his potential in manifestation: focusing thoughts and energy to be able to create something tangible in this world. This Fool has met people in his life truly qualified as a Wizard in his or her own right: teachers, mentors and persons in authority. But truly noteworthy is the real-life Wizard that the Fool met when he was dabbling in the occult and begun Santeria Filipina. This Wizard from Cubao mentored the Fool in the arts of divination of both the Tarot and the Diloggun, the Santeria divination ritual. He walked the Fool through his first guided meditation to activate his merkabah (Google mo, girl). He prepared the Fool to receive the mysteries of Santeria: Eleggua, the Warriors and eventually Asiento. (Google mo ulit: Santeria/Regla de Ocha). He also gav ...

Before I publish my new post, I just want to quickly apologize for the delay. Shit happens. Sometimes a lot of shit happens. Anyway, I've recovered from my writer's block and is ready for a new post. Again sorry for the delay but I hope you like the new post.

I am the Fool. Although now I feel trapped and alone, I feel the direction of the Fool in the cards. I am hopeful and I want to challenge myself with a radical faith to leave this lonely tower. This blog is the first step. At least I am able to go out relive my past and be at the moment and look forward to a favorable future. After a difficult diagnosis, I thought I can get through with this on my own. I was totally wrong, I suffered through my disease with unending doctors’ appointments, doses of medicines I did not know was possible, and a feeling of weakness I cannot explain. I thought I had a lot of friends, I asked for help but only a few came running. I saw the real-ness of my friendships. Feeling hopeless, I phoned my younger sister and asked for their help. I came clean. I felt the support of my whole extended family just like the old times. Some still scolded me and some didn’t want to see how the disease ate me away. I felt loved. Paired with the support of th...